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Have a good laugh at some short
funny jokes!
It can lighten the mood or enhance a good day.
Why not share with a friend who loves a really funny joke:-)
We can't see them getting mad at you!
Who doesn't enjoy some very extreme humor for free now and again?
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 Joke 1
A doctor of psychology was doing his normal morning rounds
when
he entered a patient's room. He found Patient #1 sitting
on the floor,
pretending to saw a piece of wood in half.
Patient #2 was hanging from the ceiling, by his feet.
The doctor asked patient number 1 what he was doing. The patient replied,
"Can't you see I'm sawing this piece of wood in half?" The doctor inquired
of Patient #1 what Patient #2 was doing. Patient #1 replied, "Oh. He's my
friend, but he's a little crazy. He thinks he's a lightbulb." The doctor
looks up and notices Patient #2's face is going all red.
The doctor asks Patient #1, "If he's your friend, you should get him down
from there before he hurts himself"
Patient #1 replies, "What? And work in the dark?"
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Joke 2
A Doctor and his wife are having a fight at the breakfast table.
The husband gets up in a rage and says, "and you are no good in bed either"
and storms out of the house.
After sometime he realizes he was nasty and decides to make amends
and rings her up.
She comes to phone after many rings and the irritated husband says
"what took you so long to answer the phone"?
She says, "I was in bed".
"In bed this late, doing what"?
"Getting a second opinion" she says.
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Joke 3
A man was walking down the street when he noticed his grandpa
sitting on the porch, in the rocking chair, with nothing on
from the waist down. "Grandpa, what are you doing?" he exclaimed.
The old man looked off in the distance and did not answer him.
"Grandpa, what are you doing sitting out here with nothing on below
the waist?" he asked again.
The old man slyly looked at him and said, "Well, last week I sat
out
here with no shirt on, and I got a stiff neck. This was your Grandma's idea!"
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Joke 4
There's a man sitting at a bar just looking at his drink.
He stays like that for half an hour. Then, a big trouble-making truck
driver steps next to him, takes the drink from the guy, and just drinks
it all down. The poor man starts crying. The truck driver says, "Come on man,
I was just joking. Here, I'll buy you another drink. I just can't stand
seeing a man crying."
"No, it's not that. This day is the worst of my life. First, I fall asleep,
and I'm late to my office. My boss, in an outrage, fires me. When I leave
the building to my car, I found out it was stolen. The police say they can
do nothing. I get a cab to return home and when I leave it, I remember I left
my wallet and credit cards there. The cab driver just drives away. I go home
and when I get there, I find my wife sleeping with the gardener. I leave home
and come to this bar. And when I was thinking about putting an end to my life,
you show up and drink my poison."
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Joke 5
Two guys were in a bar, and they were both watching
the television when the news came on. It showed a guy
on a bridge who was about to jump, obviously suicidal.
"I'll bet you $10 he'll jump," said the first guy.
"Bet you $10 he won't," said the second guy.
Then, the guy on the television closed his eyes and
threw himself off the bridge. The second guy hands
the first guy the money.
"I can't take your money," said the first guy. "I cheated you.
The same story was on the five o'clock news." "No, no. Take it,"
said the second guy. "I saw the five o'clock news too. I just
didn't think the guy was dumb enough to jump again!"
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